Death is something very difficult to explain to children and it is natural that parents want to protect their children from the pain and sadness that it produces; But children must go through the grieving process just as adults must overcome the loss to move forward.Keep in mind that children's understanding of death depends on their maturity.In your explanation, use reasoning with words that your child can understand. Be guided by simplicity.Instead of waiting until a tragedy occurs to talk about death, it is a good idea to talk about it taking advantage of examples such as the death of an animal or visit our loved ones from time to time in the cemetery. Respect for our dead is not an entelechy, it is to continue to love its teachings.
These conversations will help children get used to the idea that death happens and that it can be by accident, by illness or because life ends when one gets very old.When a death occurs it warns children of serious illnesses in which relatives or close friends are found, parents should talk to their children before death occurs. So, if death occurs, the children will be prepared and the event will not be a surprise. In addition, when there is a serious illness in the family, children may feel that something unusual is happening. Changes in schedules, emotional distress, the atmosphere of sadness in the home, can introduce elements of anguish and / or fear for children. It is therefore very important that parents explain to them what is happening and why they are sad and act differently.The sooner you report, the sooner you can face the loss. It may be tempting to postpone the news, simply to save them from sadness.
Make no mistake, postponing the news will not solve anything. Talking to children quickly also ensures that you are the one who communicates the news, instead of someone else doing it.Define "death" in clear and simple terms. Parents should explain to their children what "dying" means. They should make sure that their children know that the deceased will not be able to walk, talk or breathe ..., has died and will not live again.Telling children that "grandma has fallen asleep and will not wake up" or something similar will probably make children afraid to go to sleep for fear they will never wake up.Use simple words that help establish the fact that the body is biologically dead.Be honest. Even children as young as three can detect when something sad is happening at home. They may also feel when someone is not telling them the whole truth.
If the children have been given an inadequate explanation ("- She is sleeping", "- She is seeing us from up there", or any other phrase or reasoning that attributes to the deceased properties that only being alive can be had) will be given realize that they are dealing with something that can be confusing, frightening and unknown. They can even create a fantasy about what is happening. The attempts of parents to avoid facing the loss are often counterproductive.Encourage them to ask questions. Parents should show their children that they are available to answer any questions they can ask and they will respond honestly.Remember something basic. Death must make us value life and the importance of its care.